Before I open a can of worms on a debate that always seems to occur on this topic, I’m not an expert in any shape or form, I’ve only given birth to 2 children and watched endless labour programs during both my pregnancies! This is simply how I feel about the whole thing after my 2 labours.
With Kayleigh I went through the whole natural labour, granted I ended it with a lovely epidural! I had a recorded 22 hour labour from start to finish but only a 9 hour established labour.
I’m not going to lie it was probably one of the most painful things i will ever experience in my life but at the end of it, I got my reward after 2 hours of pushing, all 7lb 2oz of yummy baby. I had every kind of pain relief going, I was tired, I was snappy but the rush of love I got once i had her place skin to skin was so immense I still remember it. I remember the whole thing so clearly. It couldn’t have been that bad as I was ready to pop again 20 months later!
Yet Ethan’s birth was a bit of an “odd” experience. We found out at our 4d scan at 26 weeks that Ethan was in the breach position, at this point he was feet down. By the time i got refered to the hospital by my midwife they weren’t too sure how he was laying!
We were giving the options, we could attempt to turn him, an elective c-section or a natural birth (though this option wasn’t advised). We took the decision to attempt to turn him but it failed miserably, leaving me more grumpy than when I went in.
So it was decided a c-section it was and off we went with our due date to meet our little man.
That day came, it was hard to leave Kayleigh with my mum before knowing it was the last time I was just “her” mummy. The whole day was a bit surreal to be honest, waiting in a ward where people were being monitored for issues with pregnancies knowing that it was likely to be the last time that I would be pregnant.
Going into theatre is also strange as I had never been there before for any reason, lots of people, lights and machines. The procedure itself was painless if a bit odd and within 20 minutes of going into theatre he was here. All 8lb 14oz of him stuck bum 1st ready to come out, which is why he was never going to turn.
He was shown to me over the screen then cleaned up and brought back to me before being handed to his daddy, because of the position I was in and all the wires I didn’t feel confident in holding him.
I don’t know why but I felt I had cheated the whole thing that any women should be able to do – give birth. I felt guilty for not making all the effort that I did to bring Kayleigh into the world.
Don’t get me wrong I love my son to death but I feel like I failed him in a way. I know he wont understand this and it’s just me emotionally but I still think about it.
So it comes back to that old debate natural labour vs c-section and for me personally natural labour wins hands down. In no way am I against c-sections I just wouldn’t personally pick it as my 1st option unless it was for medical reasons.
That’s not to say that you shouldn’t have a c-section if that’s what you really want, not at all. You’re the mum to be, you’ve carried your child this far, it’s up to you to make the decision on how to bring your child into the world, the same way it is your decision on how to bring your child up. Everyone is different and for me I wouldn’t want to have a c-section again if I didn’t have to.
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