This is a collaborative post
All families go through unstable and uncertain moments during their time together. Even when you’ve got young children, and you think they don’t quite understand (or won’t be able to remember) the trouble you might be going through, they can still sense that something’s up! They can feel a lot more than we often give them credit for, after all.
And it’s because of this that we need to try our best, as parents, to make sure children feel safe and happy during such uncertain times. Whether you’ve lost your job, or you might be having relationship troubles at the moment, your attention needs to focus on the little ones who live with you.
So, let’s make sure you’re finding that an easy task to pull off!
Make Sure You Keep Talking!
Talking is key during times like these. The more you talk, the more you provide a positive and encouraging environment – your children are less likely to rail against you, or scream the house down when they’ve finally had enough of the silence. They’ll come to you with their upsets, and they’ll never keep anything from you; as a parent, knowing your child doesn’t want to talk to you is one of the hardest things.
Even if you’re seeing a branch of family solicitors in between family time, make sure you’re always sitting down and being open and honest with your kids – it’ll encourage them to do the same in return. Always make the effort to phrase the adult world in a way that they will understand.
Try to Keep Things Normal
Uncertain times can be a real upheaval for you, and that’s something you shouldn’t pass on to your children. Try to keep things normal, or as normal as possible. Dinner at the same time every night, and pudding afterwards. Taking them to school as normal in the morning, and letting them stay around a friend’s house in the afternoon, etc.
Of course, if one of your child’s parents isn’t going to be around as constantly as they used to be, it’s going to be a real challenge to try and minimize this disruption. So take things patiently, and make sure you’re always dealing out a heaping pile of gentleness towards your son’s questions, or your daughter’s insistent reminder that it’s time to call your partner so she can say goodnight.
Soon enough, these things will become normality to them, as long as you stay constant and consistent with your own attitudes and behaviour; give your daughter a time to count down to in the evening, and never push your son’s questions away, but make sure you’re authoritative and clear in your answers. As a result, the new boundaries will be reinforced without your children even realising it.
Uncertain times plague as all, and as a family, it’s something you have to tackle together. Your children are always going to be your first priority, so make sure you’re doing what you need for them.